Mittens the destroyer - goodbye my friend.

My companion, confident and friend, mittens the destroyer, 18 years old, which they say is old for a cat left the living today but it wasn't nearly enough time for me to spend with him. He listened when I needed an ear, cuddled when i needed a hug and became larger than life in the eyes of a little girl. From six weeks old he would climb onto my bed, bury his head in my hair and knead like I was his mama. He did that until a week ago, and where he used to leave little holes in my head from his claws, he now leaves a huge hole in my heart that I cannot begin to imagine I will ever be able to fill again. A cat that believed he was a person, I don't know if he ever knew, he was so much more, he was everything. There were times in the last 18 years I honestly did not know how I was going to make it through, where he would insert himself in my lap, wrap his arms around my neck and bury his head in my shoulder. So many times I held on for life. I love you Mittens, you helped me go on so many nights, I hope you knew how much you meant.


There are so many wonderful memories I have from this larger than life cat, from his love of human food and his obvious belief that having the highest seniority in the household meant he should have a dedicated spot at the dinner table AND a full plate of food. The memory of his paw slipping up from Meghan’s lap to scoop vittles from her plate as efficiently as possible. From his conviction that he ruled the roost to the reality that some days he truly did, to his moments of vulnerability where he would climb into my hair and knead, he was engrained in the very fabric of my life. My heart feels broken and I have a hard time coming to terms with the cold fact that never again will he be able to hold those broken pieces together with his love.

I love you Mittens, I cannot imagine a life without you, my tears fall where you should be and this ache in my chest is unbearable. I know that it will get less painful with time and for that I am thankful. Mittens, if you’re out there in kitty heaven somewhere I hope you know the imprint you left on not only me but this whole family. Goodbye my friend, thank you for getting me through the last eighteen years knowing unconditionally I was loved. I hope you know so were you.