Peeing in the bathtub

Is it wrong to sit and laugh from the sofa when your toddler is about ten feet away stuck under the dining room table screaming at you from the bars of the chair legs? So I get up to rescue him and give him his cup and what does he do? Throws his cup and grabs the chair to pull it back into place.


Apparently he just needed a reason to protest and the mommy just went and ruined it. Now I’m back on the sofa laughing at him as he protests at me. Although his attention seems to have moved on to the straw he’s holding in his hand. He is still every few seconds letting out a howl but they just aren’t as convincing!

Toddlers are an endless source of amusement. Take the bath for instance. He sat in a tub full of toys and played primarily with the facecloth, the hair rinsing bucket, his belly button and his penis. Our family doctor gave him this squirt bottle that you are supposed to use to power wash your sinuses (that hurts like a hot damn by the way), which Finnegan had great fun standing up and squirting until just recently, when he discovered he could get the same affect if he stood up, held his penis and peed in the tub. A great many giggles have erupted over that particular game. Unless his seven year old brother is in the tub with him, then it causes giggling AND screaming.

It amazes me how kids can play for a long period of time in a very small amount of lukewarm, then cold water and not want to get out. I’d be a shivering mass of flesh, fat and bone. Although, I would probably end up with about the same amount of water in my bath, albeit a little warmer. Put an inch of water in and my fat ass fills the tub to overflowing. Although I don’t pee in the tub as a general rule.

My sister and family came to visit from South Carolina recently, which was lovely. It’s always nice to remember why I am so inadequate! My sister Jodi is a Doctor; weighs about 100 lbs soaking wet and is extremely likable. What a bitch huh?

Anyway, she has a ten month old son. Guess what his name is? Casey. Yep, our family is whacked. Casey and Finnegan may no longer be on Mr. Dress-up but they have come home to us! It was completely not on purpose either. I just hope the next one isn’t called “Mr. Dress-up” or her husband doesn’t break his tickle trunk trying!

It’s been a slow week in a day of, can you tell? Anyway, off to rescue the toddler who is trying to stick the straw UP his nose now.